"What is the good in being useful when all that results is to be taken advantage of?"
The question was once posed to me with an air of dumbfoundedness. Admittedly, I struggled to answer without a brief delay. To be useful to another had always entailed a sense of accomplishment to me, that the skills I've developed thus far had a purpose in society. Any contributions made to society was - and is - viewed as a privilege, validation that my work is not exclusively beneficial in a theoretical space.
As a consequence, it is of no surprise that the inability to make timely progress and results leads to a sense of dread and, in an extreme case, a crippling sentiment of guilt - a self-inflicted belief that a singular fault would be enough to drag down a team. While it is ongoing task to straighten myself of the excessive burdens I've created in my own head, my determination to be "useful" remains as resilient as ever.
Being able to bring some degree of worth to the table was enlightening. Receiving praise, on the other hand, often supplies pressure than motivation.
The question was once posed to me with an air of dumbfoundedness. Admittedly, I struggled to answer without a brief delay. To be useful to another had always entailed a sense of accomplishment to me, that the skills I've developed thus far had a purpose in society. Any contributions made to society was - and is - viewed as a privilege, validation that my work is not exclusively beneficial in a theoretical space.
As a consequence, it is of no surprise that the inability to make timely progress and results leads to a sense of dread and, in an extreme case, a crippling sentiment of guilt - a self-inflicted belief that a singular fault would be enough to drag down a team. While it is ongoing task to straighten myself of the excessive burdens I've created in my own head, my determination to be "useful" remains as resilient as ever.
Being able to bring some degree of worth to the table was enlightening. Receiving praise, on the other hand, often supplies pressure than motivation.
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With the arrival of March, the global population enters their third year of the COVID-19 pandemic. On a personal level, it marks my one-year anniversary with the most despicable projects of my working lifetime. Both have had their grim moments, with each feeding off the other to intensify moments of dread and despair.
I've turned to friends (virtually) and, most notably, in-house creations in search of solace. The occasional CoCo provides joy, as do Lindt truffles - in justifiable amounts, of course.
I've turned to friends (virtually) and, most notably, in-house creations in search of solace. The occasional CoCo provides joy, as do Lindt truffles - in justifiable amounts, of course.
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At a time where many were coping with the situation by introducing small tidbits of happiness, I powered through the chaos, turning a blind eye to the negatives and striving to maintain only optimism. Forgotten were the sweet treats that I enjoyed tremendously, as well as the favourite cereal of my teen years, Crispix. Having succumbed to inflation over the years, its acquisition was forgoed on the basis of economics. In retrospect, the unit rate was a meager price to pay in comparison to many other hobby items (ahem, concerts).
Recent experiences of excitement include quick, weekday trips to the mall, the commencement of Business Proposal, and working evenings with a side of (surprisingly not-too-sweet) cider.
Recent experiences of excitement include quick, weekday trips to the mall, the commencement of Business Proposal, and working evenings with a side of (surprisingly not-too-sweet) cider.
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Meals of the week have comprised of takeout after takeout sessions, with once-fresh dark, leafy greens rotting in our produce drawer to no avail. Frozen kale saves the day in such instances, though fails to compensate health and nutrition points.
To curb an inkling of a craving for Caribbean cuisine, small Oxtail and Curried Chicken sets with Rice and Peas are ordered from Jerk & BBQ Haven. The compact grab-and-go establishment resides not far from the City Centre district, nested inconspicuously in the plaza where The Kolkata Club had once stood.
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The Oxtail was flavourful, though quite bony, with sharp edges causing the tongue to curl in agitation. Delicious were the plump, gravy-soaked rice grains - soft and easy to consume, unlike that of McKoy's. Curried Chicken was, by far, the least mild of the selections I've tried, yet splendidly supple and undeniably delicious. Fleshy pieces were regrettably few though, with no more than two medium-sized chunks and a partially intact drumstick resting atop the rice platter. The rice-to-meat ratio was a whopping 17:3 (otherwise depicted as 85% rice).
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Pairing alongside with the mains were small containers of Steamed Veggies, Cow Foot Soup, and Peanut Punch. "Steamed" were the cabbage and carrot slices not, for they adopted a slick texture commonly obtained through pan-frying. The Cow Foot Soup was starchy, thickened with potatoes and harbouring more starchy dumplings than collagen-harnessing components.
The most repulsive of all was the Peanut Punch, which burned the throat with each sip. Irish Moss was observed as the primary ingredient; only upon Googling did were the authentic origins of the seaweed brought to light. Authenticity aside, the tacky consistency and ridiculously sweet composition did not warrant its hefty six-dollar (plus tax!) price tag.
The most repulsive of all was the Peanut Punch, which burned the throat with each sip. Irish Moss was observed as the primary ingredient; only upon Googling did were the authentic origins of the seaweed brought to light. Authenticity aside, the tacky consistency and ridiculously sweet composition did not warrant its hefty six-dollar (plus tax!) price tag.
The diner operated leisurely, unlike Shandra's, so prepare for a wait even amidst peak lunch hours. At the very least, acceptable forms of payment extend beyond cash.
Creations of the week included:
1) Egg Tarts w/ Puff Pastry Crust (酥皮蛋撻)
1) Egg Tarts w/ Puff Pastry Crust (酥皮蛋撻)
Earlier in the week, I was made aware of a certain polar bear's desire for yum cha. Within that dimsum spread was a variety of classic Cantonese dishes, including Hong Kong's favourite egg tart.
"酥皮 or 牛油皮??" I immediately wanted to know. Between friends, it had constituted nothing short of a debate sparking embers from each side of the egg tart-loving spectrum. My personal preference had always been the butter tart base: sturdy, crunchy, and resistant against moisture penetration. Others adamantly disagreed, declaring the unrivalled flaky qualities of a puff pastry shell. I had countered on the bases of puff pastry being messy to consume (oh, the shatters!) and the icky greasiness stemming from the utilization of oil in place of butter.
"酥皮 for dimsum." The response came loud and clear, not imposingly so, but in a manner indicative of preference.
Further prompts came at seeing ochungg's weekday afternoon yumcha spread and confidence instilled from remarks extended towards my baking prowess fostered over the years of COVID. "I believe in you. If anyone I know can pull it off, it'll be you."
"酥皮 or 牛油皮??" I immediately wanted to know. Between friends, it had constituted nothing short of a debate sparking embers from each side of the egg tart-loving spectrum. My personal preference had always been the butter tart base: sturdy, crunchy, and resistant against moisture penetration. Others adamantly disagreed, declaring the unrivalled flaky qualities of a puff pastry shell. I had countered on the bases of puff pastry being messy to consume (oh, the shatters!) and the icky greasiness stemming from the utilization of oil in place of butter.
"酥皮 for dimsum." The response came loud and clear, not imposingly so, but in a manner indicative of preference.
Further prompts came at seeing ochungg's weekday afternoon yumcha spread and confidence instilled from remarks extended towards my baking prowess fostered over the years of COVID. "I believe in you. If anyone I know can pull it off, it'll be you."
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Laminating pastry is a fearful process. In one of my earliest attempts, the butter had dissolved into the dough and even escaped through the sides. The resulting specimens were heavy and doughy - arguably tasty, but hardly bearing any resemblance to the concept in mind.
To revisit a similar concept nearly two years later was frightening nonetheless. A recipe for Macau's renowned pastel de nata showed a thin slab of butter being encased within a largely bland dough base, followed by letter folding, chilling, and repeating to achieve flaky layers. I opted for an easier formula, a dough crafted similarly to SK's fundamental pie dough. Ruffled layers emerged in spite of the fewer number of folds; the dough was exceptionally dry and rigid to shape, but help its shape well while baking.
To revisit a similar concept nearly two years later was frightening nonetheless. A recipe for Macau's renowned pastel de nata showed a thin slab of butter being encased within a largely bland dough base, followed by letter folding, chilling, and repeating to achieve flaky layers. I opted for an easier formula, a dough crafted similarly to SK's fundamental pie dough. Ruffled layers emerged in spite of the fewer number of folds; the dough was exceptionally dry and rigid to shape, but help its shape well while baking.
The original recipe had claimed a total of 16 shells and 2.25 cups of sweet egg custard, though I was able to form 20 shells with a little less than 2.25 cups after double sieving. But, even with distinctly more tart shells emerging, a leftover portion egg custard stood me squarely in the eye. The rest was quickly poured into a Pyrex and slid onto the middle rack. The egg tarts occupied the lower rack, with a few more on the middle rack due to lack of space.
My efforts yielded products near identical to those shown in the recipe photos. The sole exception was that my filling had spilled, seeping into the layers and permeating to give way to sodden-ness. But the base remained intact, unlike my apple pie, It's just that the layers weren't flaky.
The extra egg custard would have been a dream come true for me in my adolescent years, though far too sugary for the present me who swears by black coffee.
The extra egg custard would have been a dream come true for me in my adolescent years, though far too sugary for the present me who swears by black coffee.
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"It tastes like a butter crust." remarked the polar bear. I couldn't deny these words and agreed with a sigh.
Laminated pastry is still a fearful process.
Laminated pastry is still a fearful process.
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2) Chocolate Japanese Cheesecake
Cravings seem to surface at the oddest hours. The night before a hair-washing day came the sudden desire for Chocolate Japanese Cheesecake. It wasn't an item that Sunday Baking had executed previously, thus I sought guidance from the first video I lay eyes on. (In my defense, it had been a long evening, and I wanted no more than increased screentime before bed.)
Cravings seem to surface at the oddest hours. The night before a hair-washing day came the sudden desire for Chocolate Japanese Cheesecake. It wasn't an item that Sunday Baking had executed previously, thus I sought guidance from the first video I lay eyes on. (In my defense, it had been a long evening, and I wanted no more than increased screentime before bed.)
The 6-inch pan shown in the video coincidentally aligned with my newest purchase, so it seemed a fitting experiment to kill two birds with one stone. Thursdays are Chocolate Cheesecake days at Uncle Tetsu, leading me to hesitate slightly before embarking on the journey. Impatience prompted me to construct the formula after breakfast, as a two-hour baking time would present an item for feasting just before lunchtime.
But this was no Uncle Tetsu. The cross-section was airier, more delicate, and essentially a hybrid between Japanese Cheesecake and Souffle Cheesecake. Melted Surfin granted a boost of chocolatey-ness to the cheesy delicacy.
But this was no Uncle Tetsu. The cross-section was airier, more delicate, and essentially a hybrid between Japanese Cheesecake and Souffle Cheesecake. Melted Surfin granted a boost of chocolatey-ness to the cheesy delicacy.
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Alas, the cake was nearly perfect, had I not been so hasty.
The recipe wasn't terribly difficult, which will likely induce a second trial under conditions less demanding of my attention (ie. no pending meetings).
- Failure to monitor the oven temperature led to premature cracking.
- Tipping the cake out from within while still warm resulted in a catastrophe: crack propagation and a dismal appearance
- Extending the baking time for an additional ten minutes (with the top covered in foil) rendered the cake dry and crumbly, failing to hold together in a slice.
The recipe wasn't terribly difficult, which will likely induce a second trial under conditions less demanding of my attention (ie. no pending meetings).
3) Financiers
Financiers are undeniably better in a pan dedicated to their creation. Not only do they unmold without resistance, the batter is distributed evenly in a shallow, rectangular shape, allowing the edges to be crisp and dry to touch, while the centre moist and delectable.
That said, despite witnessing success in achieving the correct shape and consistency, the profile pales in butteriness compared to Third Wave's edition.
That said, despite witnessing success in achieving the correct shape and consistency, the profile pales in butteriness compared to Third Wave's edition.
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Perhaps I ought to have sifted the icing sugar. Though, really, smoothing out the lumps manually would have minimal impact given the formula's low gluten content. If anything, I would have liked to reduce the proportion of icing sugar, or swap in cornstarch for a refined take.
Onto the next recipe! - I dare to announce my departure from Sunday in this scenario.
Onto the next recipe! - I dare to announce my departure from Sunday in this scenario.
4) Vanilla Custard
The three egg yolks from the aforementioned undertaking and remnants of evaporated milk were combined with vanilla extract, vanilla bean paste, and four heaping tablespoons of granulated sugar to form a custard base. Next steps involved positioning the mixture over low heat and whisking thoroughly, allowing gentle coagulation to a loose but creamy, vanilla-specked custard.
A fruitful Friday rolled into perspective. My lack of appetite sent me to the pantry for chicken noodle soup. Being unable to locate any, I turned to ABC Soup, Holiday luncheon meat, and large can of diced tomatoes - initially reserved for pasta sauce that had never come into fruition. It was far too acidic for my liking, but succeeded in stimulating an otherwise dormant desire for sustenance.
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Dinner was easier on the stomach. The promise of pho meant a cozy broth and soothing selection of fresh ingredients - a delightful change from the greasier offerings of late.
A distinct aversion towards the traditional noodle dish had been declared previously, then responded to with raised eyebrows and bewilderment. "You haven't had good pho." It was probably true.
Both my birthday buddy and a certain polar bear swore by I Love Pho, and I was keen to rectify my misconceptions, should that have been the case.
Our 8 PM arrival saw limited parking and a full restaurant of patrons. Several others formed the takeout queue leading up to the cashier. Thankfully, the swift turnover rate worked in our favour, enabling seating by a sriracha-splashed window.
Both my birthday buddy and a certain polar bear swore by I Love Pho, and I was keen to rectify my misconceptions, should that have been the case.
Our 8 PM arrival saw limited parking and a full restaurant of patrons. Several others formed the takeout queue leading up to the cashier. Thankfully, the swift turnover rate worked in our favour, enabling seating by a sriracha-splashed window.
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A young member of staff drifted over with two tablets. The one with the cracked screen was left for our perusal; a pen and order sheet resided beside it. We took to sharing fresh rolls (my suggestion) and as well as a Large pho.
The Fresh Rolls could be ordered in sets of two for $6.95 or four for $10.95, allowing for maximum customization capabilities. From the vast assortment of appetizers, I narrowed down my picks to the Fresh Rolls with Shrimp and Pork (#102) and Fresh Rolls with Grilled Beef (#105). The former was true to its name, undeniably fresh with a soft, chewy rice paper exterior, crunchy greens, and mild-tasting cold cut. The latter earned affection from those accustomed to heavier-tasting dishes; we experienced the aromatic waft of grilled beef before even laying eyes on the specimen. Both were scrumptious, though the peanut sauce could likely be omitted for the more flavourful of the duo.
The Fresh Rolls could be ordered in sets of two for $6.95 or four for $10.95, allowing for maximum customization capabilities. From the vast assortment of appetizers, I narrowed down my picks to the Fresh Rolls with Shrimp and Pork (#102) and Fresh Rolls with Grilled Beef (#105). The former was true to its name, undeniably fresh with a soft, chewy rice paper exterior, crunchy greens, and mild-tasting cold cut. The latter earned affection from those accustomed to heavier-tasting dishes; we experienced the aromatic waft of grilled beef before even laying eyes on the specimen. Both were scrumptious, though the peanut sauce could likely be omitted for the more flavourful of the duo.
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Constituting an off-the-menu item, our Large pho was requested with three toppings: Lightly Fat Well-Done Beef, Beef Tripe, and Beef Balls. For the first time in my existence, the broth did not overwhelm my palate with parchedness. Within it was perceived a tolerable amount of monosodium glutamate; accents of mint and a hint of lime offered comfort and heartiness. The beef balls were a tad tougher than preferred, exhibiting a stabilizer-brimming consistency but nonetheless delicious. Fresh scallions were a nice touch, though I could have done without the slivers of red onions.
At the time of our departure, I caught sight of the grilled pork and fried rice platters on other tables. I had only strode past while en route from one of the three single washroom stalls, yet its fragrance and vivid presentation invaded my peripheral by appealing to both smell and sight.
At the time of our departure, I caught sight of the grilled pork and fried rice platters on other tables. I had only strode past while en route from one of the three single washroom stalls, yet its fragrance and vivid presentation invaded my peripheral by appealing to both smell and sight.
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Countless requests had been posed to the staff during our stay, who, despite the customer volume, showed unyielding kindness and readiness to assist. Made vocal was the need for menu clarification/substitutions, spoons, containers for leftovers, a container for excess sauce, and a plastic bag. Implied was the act of sharing, which had been met the agile reaction of bringing sharing bowls without being asked.
The experience was exceptional and budget-friendly to boot, paving the way for future visits, hopefully in accompaniment of my birthday buddy.
The experience was exceptional and budget-friendly to boot, paving the way for future visits, hopefully in accompaniment of my birthday buddy.
The evening was concluded with a brisk walk at Shoppers, where pricey packages of limited edition Frosted Flakes were observed.
Across the street was Tru Tea, a somewhat recent addition to City Centre's hub for bubble tea.
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The Lychee Dragon Fruit Miracle would set us back a whopping $7.25, totalling upwards of nine dollars with tax and tip. The large cup was adequately sweetened with fragments of refreshing lychee and the subtle essence of pink dragonfruit. Beyond its temperate refreshing properties though, I saw no justification for its atrocious price tag.
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