Out & About #377 | Paisley Coffeehouse & Eatery

​The biggest attraction about Westdale is convenience. Being easily accessible by HSR and exceptionally close to campus, it's the ideal spot to camp out when a short break surfaces between classes.

Apparently a number of events took place as I was stressing out en route to the airport last month: Pablo finally opened in the Bay/Dundas area, Bake Code subsequently launched their Thai Iced Tea, and My Dog Joe was revamped to become Paisley.

​I had probably only visited My Dog Joe twice prior, as the environment was loud and dim, the singular washroom stall was dusty and depressing, and the selection lacking. Now renovated to include bright bursts of teal, a shelf of potted plants, and decor in the form of local artwork, the establishment looked promising.

​Service, on the other hand, wasn't. From the very moment I entered the premises, a middle-aged lady glared in my direction, specifically towards the small electronic device strapped across my neck. I was interrogated for taking photos of the cafe in the crudest way possible.
Furrowing her brows into a nasty grimace once seemingly wasn't enough, for she continued to press "What are you going to do with them?". And of course, telling her that I simply enjoyed visiting various places and snapping photos along the way didn't sound acceptable enough of an answer.
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​The attitude of the eldest member of the cafe made me feel very uncomfortable as a customer, and as if my business was appreciated less than any other non-photo-capturing client. It wasn't a positive manner to commence the visit, nor did the tension ease off gradually during my stay. Said middle-aged lady took a break amidst this trip, but I continued to feel her judging glower until her back was turned against me.

​Paisley Coffeehouse & Eatery looks significantly more modern than the its previous occupant. The dreary, drab atmosphere of My Dog Joe has been replaced with lighter-hued walls and a shifted kitchen for additional seating. A laptop-specific area was even advertised on their social media page, evidently as a selling factor to students.
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​Though while seating has increased, spatial density has surged, making grand contributions to noise pollution. There is simply not enough space for customers to feel at ease.
Put short, seating seemed scarce - customers were constantly asking others if they minded sharing tables. I also experienced major issues with squeezing onto my stool in the supposed outlet-powered area - a consequence of the inconsiderate actions taken by a mother and her newborn's stroller.

Despite the improved vibe, Paisley is more reminiscent of a bustling diner than a pleasant, relaxing environment cafe. The name has indeed changed, but the original roots of My Dog Joe remain. The spot is family-operated, meaning that older members of staff are middle-aged citizens that clearly do not comprehend the technical shifts in society. Present are a few hipster baristas/food preparation staff that provide better, more earnest service but with kinks in professionalism.

​In regards to the laptop-friendly area, it was a good idea in theory, though poor in execution. Backless stools make for uncomfortable prolonged stays, while unlacquered surfaces are magnets for crumbs and clothing snags. Outlets were installed underneath the wooden bar area in oddly inconvenient orientations: They faced downwards to the ground instead of outwards in the direction of the user. Additionally, the sockets failed to provide good connectivity.

"Free Wi-Fi" is another claim that's largely misleading. As opposed to a password-secured network that allows users to automatically connect upon password entry, Paisley operated on Cogeco with an open network that permitted a tawdry series of three 30-minute sessions. Each individual session required an email sign in, and the process would need to be repeated on each and every device.
The limited Internet usage sent a clear message: Paisley does not intend for guests to stay longer than 90 minutes at a time, nor are lengthy visits encouraged. With such a rambunctious environment, I probably wouldn't be inclined to stay long anyway; an area in which one cannot hear his or her own thoughts proves useless for writing and thinking.

​The repulsive dungeon of a washroom has thankfully been refurbished with improved illumination. The dust on the ledge has been (temporarily) cleaned up and adorned with ceramic-looking animal figurines. It has also been equipped with better facilities and a re-painted paper towel dispenser. The door has been relocated, with the side of original door sealed and used as a side of the kitchen. Hooks remain nonexistent.

Expanded to include beer and a larger assortment of savoury options, the new menu comprises of intriguing loose leaf teas and a plethora of ridiculously-priced vegetarian and vegan fare. It actually hadn't occurred to me that meat in all forms had been exempted from the menu until later onward.

As majority of the items exceeded the budget of an average student, combo picks were the ideal way to attain nutrition in a cost-effective manner. "The Study Group" was a fair option that included a sandwich, drink, one refill, and dessert.

​I swapped coffee for a choice of two teas - or rather, one tea and an alternative tea refill.
Iced Peach Green Tea was lightly sweetened and refreshing with underlying notes of peach. A minimal amount of ice had been added but the glass was still thoroughly iced to my liking.
Tropical Punch was an excessively fragrant tea of herbal variety. It tasted great without sweetener, though its floral aroma proved slightly overbearing with time.

My pick of the Westdale Banh Mi was, singlehandedly, the worst item of the combo. Utterly undeserving of the title of "banh mi", it contained a cashew cream spread reminiscent of cream cheese, but blander and more viscous. Pickled carrot shavings and portobello mushroom slices made up the bulk of its contents; these pieces had a tendency to tumble out from the bun during the consumption process. All components were served sandwiched between a round white bun with too many flour fallouts.
There were no similarities to Vietnamese banh mi at all - Paisley hadn't even bothered to provide a baguette, or at the very least a toasted bun.
It was unthinkable that the miniature "sandwich" was sold individually at an atrocious price tag of $8.95 before tax.

​Dessert took the form of a Chocolate Cookie. I, as the unsuspecting customer, assumed it to be indulgent and sugary. Alas, it did not possess the soft crumble nor satisfying fragrance of those containing butter. Laden with oats, gluten alternatives, and almost indiscernible chocolate chips, the chances of it being a vegan product was likely.
The item was still tasty, despite not being as chocolatey as desired, but far below that of my expectations. I had requested to take the cookie to go and had it merely shoved into a parchment paper slip, obviously devoid of napkins or even a bag for carrying. The smells infiltrated to other items in the interior of my backpack.

​Overall, this journey proved the renovated eatery ill-suited for quiet work and de-compressing. Due to its close proximity to campus, its customer base is primarily McMaster students, intertwined with groups of elders and the ocassional rude local citizen with an infant in a baby stroller that consumes more space than necessary to function.

Paisley was a drastic contrast from Ark + Anchor's more superior establishment. Regardless of service, environment, food quality/selection, accessibility to public transit, the two-floor cafe at King and Queen takes the cake!